***Caution: some mild rude humor
displayed in this post***
***Warning: Spoilers***
Rating: PG, Y7
(Parental Guidance Suggested, Not recommended for young children)
To all the Shrek fanboys and fangirls out there… CALM DOWN.
Seriously.
Now I like Shrek series
about as much as the next red-blooded Millennial, but I don’t go too crazy over
it.
Why? Because Homestar Runner
is WAY cooler.
Seriously.
Anyway. Here we go.
Now this pretty cool – dare I say it – masterpiece of an iconic film by
DreamWorks Animation came out in 2001 and pretty much changed the scene of
children’s and family films as we know it. For better or worse, well, jury’s
still out. Now while this may not necessarily be in a rivalry with Pixar for
any kind of movie (and you know what
I mean by that)…
I think that I can safely say that Shrek
is to DreamWorks as Toy Story is to
Pixar. Both seem to be the long-standing series with which people generally
associate their respective brands. Heck, even the song, It Is You (I Have Loved) (a gorgeous song to waltz to, by the way),
seemed to be the perfect accompanying track to DreamWorks’s title card!
Fun fact: Shrek was actually
the first DVD that I ever owned. I really
wanted that title to go to The Lion King
1 ½, but the mere fact that I got a DVD (way back when) was simply too good
to be choosy or petty about.
Also, this was back when DVDs had a BOATLOAD
of games and fun activities, sometimes to the
point of having a second DVD to accompany it.
Now Shrek is based on an old
William Steig of the same name. I vaguely
remember hearing that book back when I was a kid. I read it for myself years
later (pretty funny book, actually), and I could hear an old teacher’s voice in
one line. I dunno. Maybe I have that Mandela memory or something. No matter.
Shrek (voiced by Mike Myers), is a happily alone ogre who simply does… well…
disgusting ogre things. Bathing in mud, eating slugs, burping to make a fire –
okay, there are a lot of gas-related / body function jokes, which I personally
do not find funny most of the time. Like any joke, a well-placed one is going
to make me laugh, but when it goes too far or seems forced, especially in a
“children’s” flick, it just gets really annoying.
Getting off the soapbox now.
Now considering this takes place in medieval times, despite its
multiple references to modern-day life, the townsfolk are not happy with having
an ogre as a neighbor. Given the rep, I don’t blame them. Thankfully, Shrek is
a rather decent, domestic fellow. You know, for an ogre. Shrek, of course,
scares them off.
In a castle in the kingdom, Lord Farquaad –
Okay, HOW did they get away with that one??!!!
Especially in the UK???!!!!!
And thanks, internet for ruining that for me.
-- voiced by John Lithgow (or as my mother puts it, John Lithgow’s
head on a character’s body), wants to become King of DuLoc. I don’t want to
know what DuLoc could possibly mean, but if there is double entendre, DON’T
TELL ME. Anyway, he rounds up all the fairy tale creatures in the land, buying
them from the people.
The only one to escape is a talking donkey (voiced by Eddie Murphy),
who runs into Shrek, so beginning a very strange friendship that pretty much all
of us in our 20s and 30s can practically recite verbatim.
Lord Farquaad *sigh, never gonna get over that* then consults the
magic mirror, who shows three princesses L.F. can marry in order to become
king. I think this is based on The Dating
Game (my parents had to explain a LOT of this stuff to me). The mirror
shows Snow White, Cinderella, and Princess Fiona. Of course, L.F. picks Fiona,
who is locked away in the tallest tower of an abandoned castle guarded by a
fierce fire-breathing dragon. Now, Farquaad is not going to simply risk his own
life to rescue the princess. No, no. That would be noble, but too risky, if he
wishes to be king. He then holds a tournament to see who would be the brave
(unfortunate) knight to go and rescue the princess.
Shrek wakes up one night to find that his house, swamp, and home had
been mercilessly invaded by a bunch of dumped fairytale squatters. He decides
to go to Lord Farquaad to issue a complaint. He also – reluctantly – takes
Donkey with him.
That part still cracks me up!
They make it to Duloc where – oh, gosh…
Remember when I said a well-placed joke works?
This is one of them. Even if you don’t know what
they were about to say… you knew where they were
going with that one. My mom and I have a good laugh with
that.
They make it to the tournament, where Shrek and Donkey beat the living
crud out of all the knights.
This part is kinda funny, to me. Now, Joan Jett’s Bad Repuation is playing over the fight scene. However, my DVD
player has a profanity filter, and I used to leave it on “strong” when I was a
kid (it’s on “medium” now). That scene is half-muted every time. I was a bit
confused at first as to why, until I watched it on a DVD player that had not
filter. Yeah. It actually muted a couple of the words form Bad Reputation, due to the lyrics. Makes sense, no. You should’ve
seen when I tried to watch a filtered cable version of the Biggie Smalls movie.
I think I heard more in a Charlie Chaplin short.
Some sniper knights are about to kill him, but Lord Farquaad knows a
good expendable when he sees one, so he sends them to rescue Princess Fiona. It
also turns out that Farquaad owns the deed to Shrek’s swamp, so the deed
becomes an incentive to make the trip.
Shrek and Donkey enter the castle and Shrek goes for Princess Fiona,
while Donkey distracts the dragon… who happens to be female… and happens to see
no species. That wasn’t weird back then, I suppose. Shrek, disguised as a
knight goes and rescues Princess Fiona. Fiona tries to follow all the protocol
of a rescued damsel in distress, but Shrek has obviously not read his side of the etiquette book. When
they all (barely) make it out with their lives – leaving a heartbroken dragon
behind – Fiona learns that Shrek is an ogre. Obviously, prejudices on either
side flare up, but that doesn’t stop Shrek from getting her to Lord Farquaad
and trying to get his swamp squatter-free. Shrek and Fiona build a unique kind
of relationship along their journey, especially when she martial-arts the
daylights out of Robin Hood and his Merry Men – oh gosh…
*laughing uncontrollably*
I’m sorry, just the entrance alone tickles my funny bone like nothing
else.
Everything seems peachy, until…. Fiona has an aversion to dusk. Okay.
Donkey finds out later in the movie that she turns into an ogre at night, due
to a spell cast by an evil witch.
Nice spin on a common cliché.
Fiona has some appearance issues, fearing that people will despise her
as an ogre. Shrek overhears half the conversation, as he is about to declare
his love for her, and he thinks she doesn’t like him because he’s an ogre.
The next morning, Fiona (human form) sees a very agitated Shrek. He
says he heard every word (he didn’t) she said the previous night. Now she thinks he doesn’t like her ogre
form.
Can I take a minute to express this amazing plot twist?
This is incredible. Yes, we’ve all seen the “he misheard her / she
misunderstood him” type of cliché about a thousand one times. Now, this
actually blends these clichés in such a way that telephone tag could get
jealous, and it actually advances an already well-crafted plot! It cements
their prejudices even further before a final character growth in the movie.
Shrek brings Lord Farquaad to Fiona. Farquaad proposes, Fiona accepts
the proposal and requests they be married before sunset, and Shrek accepts the
deed for the swamp. Shrek, Donkey, and Fiona all go their separate ways. Shrek
returns to his home, feeling accomplished, yet empty. Fiona prepares for the
wedding, but feels saddened. Donkey meanders awhile, but then returns to the
swamp, building a border to separate ownership. Shrek fights Donkey on this,
but Donkey reminds him that he actually likes Fiona.
Shrek runs to stop the wedding (with the help of a now-ally dragon).
They stop just in time for her to change into an ogre. Lord Farquaad is
repulsed at his wife’s changing powers, but the marriage had already been
declared (despite the fact that they hadn’t kissed), and Farquaad is king… for,
like 5 or 10 seconds. Not even kidding. The dragon bursts in through a window
and eats Lord Farquaad. Newly widowed Fiona and Shrek express their love for
each other, and kiss. Fiona’s spell is broken, but remains an ogre, her “love’s
true form.” She wanted to be beautiful, but she was to Shrek, and that was all
that mattered. Shrek and Fiona get married at the swamp, and they ride off into
the sunset in their onion carriage (if you don’t get that, watch the movie),
while Donkey sings “I’m a Believer” – Smashmouth edition.
Good thing he didn’t sing Party
all the Time.
And of course, if you watch the VHS or let the DVD play through, the
party goes on with an awesome medley featuring the cast after the end of the
movie.
What do I think of this movie… I don’t know how much it’s actually
“for kids.” Granted, it’s smart and challenging for the young brain. It’s kind
of vulgar – only mildly, I guess – and there is some mild profanity, but I
think it’s pretty safe if you have a TVG on your DVD or VHS player, or if a
parent who knows how this movie goes has a remote control in his/her hand. If
your kid watches Teletubbies, maybe
think twice before letting the youngster watch it. It’s not a bad movie by any
stretch of the imagination, and it is certainly the best of the whole series. I
think, however, the best feature of this feature film, is how much this movie
can grow with you. When you’re a kid, you like the fact that this is kind of a
fairytale version of Who Framed Roger
Rabbit?. When you get older, you appreciate more of the humor the more you
watch it.
I love this movie, and I should probably watch it again sometime. It’s
been a while. Mainly for the same reason I hadn’t seen Ice Age in a long time.
***Disclaimer: This was written well over a month ago.
***WARNING: Spoilers
Rating: G, Y
(General Audiences, Kid-friendly)
I would like to offer my sincerest apology for missing last Friday’s
post. I was sick all week, and hadn’t given much thought to well, anything.
Anyway, the “holiday” I was referring to in the last post was… you
guessed it: Superbowl Sunday!
Now, I’m not much of a football person, but I do enjoy it from time to
time. Being in the Marching Band helped me to appreciate it, but I guess it
might’ve started with this little video I’ve had since I was a tot.
And yes, this is, in fact, my copy.
Aw, crud, this one has two
logos.
Whatever, I didn’t realize it back then.
You’re in the Super Bowl,
Charlie Brown! was one of those little home videos that was made to keep
kids quiet for half an hour, with the most loveable gang of children and
animals that family entertainment has ever welcomed into their homes. It was
kinda cheap, and not very intelligent, but it was still very kid-friendly. And it was partnered with NFL and... Shell? Okay, whatever.
There are basically two parts to this, and the video switches back and
forth between story lines.
The first part is Snoopy coaching an all-bird football team to victory
in an animal football championship streak, first against a team of cats, then a
team of dogs (odd), then a team of… bison.
This sounds far less ridiculous than my
writing is making it sound, I promise.
That’s pretty much it. The animation loops are basically the same with
each football play, just slap a different opposing team character on it. The
birds’ names change, though. The first set is a lot of Polish-ish “-ski” names,
the second set is what I can only assume are actual contemporary football
players’ names (like the target audience would’ve recognized them), and the
last set of names is Presidents. Oh, and you can be sure that you’ll hear a ton of animal-related puns.
For the championship game against the bison, Lucy does show up
basically to heckle Snoopy. Not that it matters, the birds win anyway. After
each victory, the birds dump “Chirpade” on unsuspecting Snoopy, except for the
championship, when they dump it on Lucy.
The second story starts off with, what else, Lucy convincing Charlie
Brown to kick the football.
Do I even need to explain what happens next?
Anyway, the gang catches up to them, with Peppermint Patty announcing
that there’s a children’s contest for punting, passing, and kicking. The winner
gets a bike and a ticket to the Super Bowl. Charlie Brown and Linus start
practicing, only to run into a cute little redhead named Melody Melody.
Not kidding, that’s her name.
And what’s with this cartoon series and gingers?
The boys get to know Melody and go out to get ice cream sundaes, where
they talk about the contest. Melody seems supportive of the boys. Linus falls
head over heels for her.
On the day of the contest, Linus seems very confident that he’d win
the contest, especially after talking to Melody. The kids all have their turns,
and Linus seems to beat out everyone, including Charlie Brown, but then there’s
one last contestant: Melody. She beats everyone by a huge margin, much to poor
played Linus’s surprise (and chagrin).
After the contest, Linus laments over his betrayal, telling Charlie
Brown that he’ll never trust anybody again. Charlie Brown tries to restore
Linus’s faith in humanity, but then guess who shows up holding a football.
😊
So that was You’re in the Super
Bowl, Charlie Brown!, with a not-so-surprising lack of Charlie Brown in
the Super Bowl. This was… cute, and not
a total corporate sell-out. It was corporately sponsored, but still very much Peanuts. (They really haven’t gone wrong
with Peanuts… yet, anyway.) I hunted
it down and watched it while I was sick, so basically my nostalgia was in
overdrive. Memories kept flooding back, even to seeing the bird holding a sign
saying “Stay in Shape,” even though I originally thought it said “Stay I’m Shape.”
I WAS A TODDLER, OKAY?
Simply put, I love this. It’s cheap, it’s not the best animation, some
of the parts were definitely aimed at
tiny kids, but I still love it. If you have kids, especially little ones, this
is great for them, as it can be hard to find kid-friendly programming that
isn’t just educational.
2018 has been delivering a one-two punch to my schedule, pretty much since the word, "Go."
I started this blogging year pretty well, what with my actually being a responsible adult and managing a blog for God knows what reason. I guess I just like writing, in general.
But then I noticed that I've been treating my blog like I have been my YouTube channel.
Firstly, I was knocked out of work by a good snow. I don't really have much access to trustworthy internet, so that was out for a while. No problem. I can just write some more... if I feel up to it.
I gotta work on my procrastination habit someday.
Anyway. The snow melted. YAY! Now you gotta cut your lunches in half for about a month.
WHAT?
To make up the hours that they told me to STAY AWAY from my job, I had to take shorter lunches, which definitely meant less potential for writing. Or even staying healthy.
How does a week-long, horrible cold sound?
These are all really lame excuses, but I do feel like my head's cleared up again. I'm rearranging my schedule now to try to work in some extra hours of sleep and work during the week. It's actually a suggestion that my mom had when we both fell asleep for about 8 or 12 hours. I thought it was a terrible idea at first (I cannot stand the thought of waking up in the middle of the night to go back to sleep a couple of hours later, especially when creative work can pass you two hours easily), but.... I'm not closed to the idea, either.
(Why in the hizeck am I telling you all this...?)
Whatever. Just expect one previously scheduled blog post with one bonus blog post for the next four weeks or so. Please not that they may not all be kid-friendly, so... chillens, be sure to talk to your mom, dad, or guardian BEFORE reading something with a content warning. Hey, I haven't been a total slacker for the past long while. Whether I'm going to get back to my YouTube page... yes. Yes I am. Someday.
I'm also planning on making my own Pinterest page. Which I technically already have, but I think I'm actually going to shut it down and start over. Make it more fake "celebrity"-friendly. I'm a little to raw in my current account. (Aka, PG, at best.)
I'm also working on my overall attitude. I've had a LOT of emotional stuff that I don't wish to bore you with. Just pray for me. And my sanity. Well, just that common sense part. My creativity often comes from my insanity. ^_^
Gotta run. My lunch break is almost over. Hoping for better things to come in 2018!
Finally, as I’ve first
mentioned at the beginning of the year[Link
to the first post of the year], I’m starting on the Peanuts holiday specials series. And let me tell you, rounding them
up was not an easy feat… at first. I first took a gander at Wikipedia, and got
instantly overwhelmed. I then did a second search, and made it to this article, which did a
nice “Year of Peanuts” compilation. I then hunted down these videos on the
Internet, and reviewed each as such.
Without further ado,
the first Peanuts to watch this year…
Happy New Year, Charlie Brown!
The story starts with
Charlie Brown’s teacher assigning a book report over Christmas break at the
very last second. She assigns the book War
and Peace. Yes, that War and Peace.
I could easily trigger-type
and grandstand about the horrors of school, the ineffectiveness of its
education, the stress levels it puts on adolescents, the overbearing structure
which stunts children’s growth, the vulnerability of students who don’t conform
to classroom status quos, and how cruel it is to suddenly assign elementary
school students a book that most adults struggle to read. But I won’t. Mainly
because scenarios involving children reading War and Peace is actually hilarious. So let’s go back to a simpler
time, when humour was not (completely) offensive.
Charlie Brown
struggles with reading this (obviously), but Linus kinda guilt-trips him with a
story of how Mrs. Tolstoy had to hand-copy the book seven times for Leo.
Is there such
a thing called death by carpal tunnel syndrome?
I can’t even
handwrite notes at a meeting anymore, I’m too slow
and have no
stamina. Sometimes I don’t even want to type.
Peppermint Patty then
invites Charlie Brown over for her New Year’s Eve party. (That should be fun,
seeing as how they still look and sound young enough to have an early bedtime.)
Charlie Brown is reluctant, even though his friends are going. Sally hopes to
dance with Linus at the party, and Lucy wants to dance with Schroeder. The
gang, except for Charlie Brown, gets enrolled in dance classes.
Charlie Brown sees
that his book report is going to be even more difficult than he first imagined,
so he tries to find a non-book version of War and Peace. There isn’t any, of
course, so he returns home to try to read. To cure his boredom, he goes down to
the dance studio to watch his friends.
Okay, the
dancing here is NOWHERE CLOSE
to that in A Charlie Brown Christmas.
Although Charlie Brown
tries to read, Peppermint Patty convinces him to dance with her. Charlie Brown
then returns home to read some more. The rest of the gang is all abuzz about
the party, especially Peppermint Patty, to Charlie Brown’s chagrin. Charlie
Brown then decides to invite the little red-haired girl, to Peppermint Patty’s
chagrin.
Apparently,
that child’s name is Heather. Forgot that.
While delivering
Heather’s invitation, Charlie Brown gets stuck in the mail slot, as he feared.
That night, he frets over his embarrassment and the party.
The next night, the
party happens, and everyone there is having a good time, Charlie Brown arrives
at the party, hoping to read some more, and hoping Heather will arrive. As
midnight approaches, Charlie Brown tries to sneak outside to read some more.
Peppermint Patty follows him outside and talks to him. Then, the countdown
starts, and Peppermint Patty returns inside. Charlie finally starts again on
his book, but falls asleep reading it, missing both the New Year Countdown and
the arrival of Heather (and dancing with her). Charlie Brown wakes up too late
for it all.
Charlie Brown finally
finishes reading War and Peace and writing the report about it the morning of
the first day back at school. He gets a D- for it. (Not bad for an elementary
school kid reading War and Peace.)
His troubles are not over, as the first assignment of the New year is … drumroll…
Crime and Punishment.
Welp, can’t
be any harder than War and Peace!
This was a cute little
short film, that’s just right for the New Year, as it combines the anxieties of
the New Year approaching, the hurry to wrap up the old year, and trying to find
some fun in between. Plus, it’s Peanuts… you cannot really go wrong. There were
tons of filler material, but that’s to be expected with these films, and for
the most part, they add to the story, rather than detract from it.
By the way,
if you happen to major in classic Russian literature,
maybe don’t
send your resume to elementary schools. Just saying. 😊
That’ll about wrap it
up for this month! I know you think I’m going to do the Valentine’s Day
specials next… hold your horses. There is at least one “holiday” before Valentine’s. 😉
While the first movie was certainly not bad, by any stretch of the imagination, when I heard that there was
a sequel I thought, why? It didn’t
merit a sequel. Everything was stitched up well in the end. Why was this a
need.
That’s when I saw the DVD cover.
What is that?
Why is it there?
Can someone please tell me why there’s a wrestling logo on a sequel to
a half-decent, barely memorable, but still kinda good movie about SURFING
PENGUINS???
Sigh…. Here I go…. I am not looking forward to this. NO, seriously,
you don’t even see the original cast members’ names on the front! It’s all
wrestlers! Like they said, “Remember those characters you grew to somehow love,
well, forget them! We’re not even putting Big Z up there, even though he was
THE plot point,” I guess someone needed to be on family-friendly entertainment?
Well, this one looks even less memorable than the first. There will be
spoilers.
Surf’s Up 2 starts with a
where-are-they-now-type segment of Cody Maverick, including an interview in
which Cody shamelessly plugs in his surfing school (by the way, check out my
YouTube page and my G+ sometime! Both are pretty cool!) Tank also butts in with
his online surfing school (he hasn’t changed a bit). Cody tries to get Tank off
his case, but Tank reminds him that he’s the 9-time champ, not Cody.
Chicken Joe, on the other hand, became a professional surfer, touring
the world with the Hang 5 – wait, who the heck are the Hang 5??! I don’t
remember them? You know what else I don’t remember? Cody’s voice!!! What the
heck?
Yeeeeeeeeahhh. I did some research. Hoo, boy.
It turns out there’s a reason none of the original cast members’ names
were listed on the cover. It’s because the voice actors are all different. What
was once an all-star cast, turned into some generic sound-alikes. So this
really is a WW Studios movie, more than it is a Sony Pictures Animation movie.
This is gonna burn, big time.
Sony: We either hit or miss!
Then again, given Shia LeBouf’s (original Cody Maverick) recent
actions, I guess I’d pick a bunch of wrestlers over him, any day. Maybe this
won’t be so bad.
Anyway, Cody gets visited by Chicken Joe, who is rich, famous, and
more decorated than a NASCAR car. Joe shares his experiences with Cody, who is
happy for Joe, but is also slightly jealous, in a sort of “What if it’d been
me?” kind of way. Joe also gives Cody a Hang 5 poster, and he reminisces of his
boyhood days when he for some reason has a vacation outside his home, and
watched the Hang 5 surf.
Okay, last movie was all about Big Z. WHAT THE HECK—
It’s okay. It’s okay. It’s a WWE movie. It’s a WWE movie.
Cody shares his lament with Lani, who sensed something was wrong.
The next day, unexpectedly, the Hang 5 arrive. A fangirling fanboy
Cody invites them over for a luau. At the luau, Mr. McMahon (the beefed-up
otter… yeah, that’s an otter) – who
has a highly disturbing desire to drink fish milk – announces that the Hang 5
will be surfing the Trenches, a legendary dangerous spot. Mr. McMahon is
retiring, and wants to put a new member in his place, specifically Lani (who he
saw parkouring to rescue a drowning baby penguin), although Cody thinks he will be the new member.
In the morning, it’s revealed that Lani’s the new member. Before the
Hang 5 leaves, Cody shows off sweet moves, and J.C. wants to keep Cody. Paige
wants to keep Lani, the Undertaker wants Chicken Joe (possibly as a meal), and
Hunter wants Tank. It’s now a contest to see who gets the last spot, and the
group goes to the Trenches at Slaughter Island. The first leg is through
crushed-whale bones quicksand. Tank takes out Cody, putting his team in last
place for the first challenge, and leaving them to wax everyone’s boards. Mr.
McMahon likes Cody’s moves, but not his attitude. J.C. assures him that he’ll
be okay. That night, J.C. lifts Cody’s spirits with a few words of
encouragement.
The Hang 5 sleep above ground to avoid attacks. Tank refuses,
challenging everyone’s bravery. Lani, Joe, and Cody also take up Tanks’s
challenge. In the middle of the night, it seems something snatches the four
rookies, but it was all a teamwork test. Cody and Lani watch the stars, taking
in all the excitement from the day, and Cody shares that he feels more
fulfilled in his life.
The crew resumes across an old abandoned bridge wire, and everyone
makes it across relatively easily, but Cody gets too hotheaded in his attempts
to outdo Tank, and has everyone fall down a cliff to their deaths.
Just kidding.
They find an ancient village with a surfer’s hall of fame. Cody wants
to be remembered for his feats, but J.C. assures him that there’s more to life
than just being famous. The other teams are in different parts of the ruins,
with one team in a room full of treasure. Tank takes a gold and jeweled
surfboard in exchange for his old surfboard. In the evening, Tank and Cody
start a fight, which naturally leads to the actual WRESTLING part of the movie.
It’s too short, in my opinion, but, then again, it’s a surfing movie, not a
wrestling movie.
The next part of their trip takes them through lava. Obviously,
surfing lava is pretty much impossible. Cody gets the idea to make a hang
glider to fly over it. Cody, once again, quarrels with Tank, revealing this
time that he has no plans to return home, to Lani’s dismay. Cody’s officially
become too full of himself, looking out for himself rather than realize that he
is a well-respected penguin already. Cody fights with Tank over the lava,
causing Chicken Joe to lose his board and almost his life. The Undertaker saves
his life, but everyone is disappointed in Cody’s attitude. Cody overhears Mr.
McMahon’s disappointment in Cody, and leaves his board with Chicken Joe and
leaves. Lani starts to look for him, but J.C. stops her, feeling fully
confident that Cody will cool off. The remainder of the group goes off to the
Trenches, where a storm is brewing.
In Cody’s meandering, he comes across a monument to a legendary surfer
who protects his people by doing a ritual called RTL – Ride the Lightning. He
runs off to tell them. The rest of the bunch arrives. Lani, being a lifeguard,
practices caution, and stays out. Chicken Joe is not up for the challenge,
either, but receives an honorary membership. Tank rides with the Hang 5, but
freaks out at the crest and wipes out. The Hang 5 wipes out at the wave, and
the Undertaker gets hit by a lightning bolt. Lani tries to revive him, but Chicken
Joe revives him with electric jellyfish.
Tank gets stranded in the water, but Cody tries to save him. J.C. ends
up saving them both. Cody essentially redeems himself, and he and Tank get
along. Cody gets offered the final spot, but turns it down to stay home as a
surf teacher. McMahon ends up staying to keep on enjoying adventures with the
Hang 5...
…Thereby rendering this movie absolutely pointless. *sigh* What a
cop-out.
The movie ends with the original commercial segment, but this time, the academy
is advertised by Cody, Lani, Chicken Joe, Tank, and the Hang 5. There are also
some “outtakes” in the credits.
What can I say about this movie? I had VERY low expectations,
considering this was a surf movie done by wrestling pros. It, like the first
movie, was not very bad, however. I kinda enjoyed it. It wasn’t a very good
movie as far as plot goes, but it’s a nice afternoon feel-good flick for
anybody who’s seen Surf’s Up (or
not), and has an hour and a half to spare.
I know that I’ve mentioned that I would be doing a Peanuts series. And
I will. I’m just going to do two weeks’ of blogging about CGI’d surfing
penguins. Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and girls, and any pets with a stunning
ability to read, Surf’s Up.
Now, there was a long stretch I had when I was a youth of going to
practically every animated and family film, accompanied by a parent, with both
of us getting tickets for the price of a single standard ticket.
If I saw a good film at a low price, I got a great deal! If the film
bombed, oh, well, we didn’t even waste $10. In this case… it was average.
Slightly above average. It’s a good film.
Since I will be reviewing the sequel to this next week, there will be
spoilers.
In a nutshell, there’s a penguin named Cody Maverick, who comes from
humble beginnings in Antarctica, where nobody really surfs. His mom is widowed,
due to his dad being eaten by a whale while he was fishing. Cody also has a
brother who constantly picks on him, as Hollywood thinks older brothers often
do.
Cody’s beyond-mundane and lackluster life is changed when a legendary
penguin surfer named Big Z...
(You know what, I’m gonna hold
my bad joke for later.)
…makes an appearance at his home land and unintentionally inspires
Cody to become a surfer himself. He practices using ice and whatever waves come
his way. Years pass, and Cody gets picked up by a recruiter for a massive
contest. Along his trip, he meets a way far-out rooster called Chicken Joe.
Like Cody, Chicken Joe lost his dad at a young age. Unlike Cody, Chicken Joe’s
dad was lost to what I can only assume was Col. Sanders.
As cruel as those untimely demises were,
I found the second one particularly hilarious.
During the tournament, Cody and Joe come up against 9-time champion
Tank Evans, who is very skilled, but is a huge bully.
At first, Cody is very clumsy in the tournament, considering he is out
of his element. Then one day, Cody comes across an old, washed-up penguin who
seems to know a lot about surfing. Yup, it’s Big Z, who was presumed dead after
his last match against Tank Evans. It turns out that Big Z chickened out when
he realized he was old news and could not keep up with the young talent, so he
faked his own death and lived in hiding, with his niece Lani, who was the only
one who knew of the secret. Lani and Cody do fall in love, by the way. Kind of
a no-brainer there.
When the old penguin is realized to be Big Z, Cody (of course) wants
him to be his trainer. Or rather… his coach……. ready for my bad joke?
HE BECOMES HIS “COACH” Z!!!! ^_^
Why yes, I do still have
my day job.
Why do you ask?
At the finals, it’s Cody, Chicken Joe, and Tank. They duke it out over
the waves, with Tank being as big a bully as ever. When he’s after Chicken Joe,
Cody disqualifies himself by taking out Tank, making Chicken Joe the champ. Big
Z returns to the public eye, and everybody lives pretty much happily ever
after.
Right?
You’ll read more on the details next week.
Now, this was just a bare-bones look at the movie, and it does seem
rather cut-and-dry. However, one thing I (and my mother, who went with me)
really enjoyed about Surf’s Up was
the fact that it was well-done in a kind of reality show/documentary footage. This
included little interviews with main and side characters, and steadicam was
also done nicely… that’s a compliment from me. I can’t STAND unnecessary
steadicam. I deliberately never watched The
Office because of its constant steadicam. I don’t care how funny Steve
Carrell is, there is no reason for every moment of an office building to feel like an intense moment!
I digress.
It was funny. It was cute. It wasn’t the most memorable, especially
since I watched Happy Feet not long
before that one. Plus, it’s kind of a Robots
+ Cars plot line, and neither one
were bad movies. If you want to spend time watching a half-decent movie and you
don’t know what to watch, definitely give this flick a rent from your local
library.
Okay, I’m rested, hope you all had a great couple of holidays (share
your story with me in the comments, if you wish), and let’s kick off the end of
the Christmas season with… [drumroll] …a Halloween special featuring virtually
nothing but Michael Jackson music!
Okay.
Michael Jackson is no stranger to posthumous success. His estate’s
currently making hundreds of millions of dollars per year. Also, he’s released
his second – yes, second – album
since his death in 2009, Scream.
Which is pretty much just a mix of classic Michael Jackson songs.
Michael Jackson is also no stranger to movies. He’s got the film Moonwalker, the kids’ film Captain EO, and the short film Ghost, not to mention his classic music
video, Thriller.
I guess that’s to be expected of a man
whose entertaining career spanned
for literally half a century in his lifetime.
Well, in 2017, the world was graced with an hour-long special
featuring his hits, Michael Jackson’s Halloween.
The special is rated PG, but that may
be for the kiddie horror elements, the main villainess being a tad short of
half-dressed, and the fact that they don’t edit some of Michael Jackson’s
lyrics.
The special is short and sweet,
and the plot is kinda predictable,
so spoilers will be provided.
The main characters are Vincent, a wannabe-DJ who is a grocery store
heir to an abnormally-passionate-about grocery-stores dad, and Victoria, a
wannabe-dancer who works as a doormat an intern for a very demanding
boss at MegaCorp. Meanwhile, a monkey lackey named Bubbles (who sounds like a
slightly Brad-Garrett-y talking version of Mr. Bobo)…
…is driving Michael Jackson to his home, and orders
bananas from the local grocery store.
Also, Victoria is commanded to watch her boss’s Dog, Ichabod (whom she
nicknames Icky for his natural “going” behavior – I have 4 dogs, I’m used to
that). The two kids run into each other, which causes Victoria to lose Icky,
but leads them to the exact place of residence – 777 Jackson Street.
(Nice one, guys.)
From there, they go down an elevator which is an interesting
combination of what I can only guess is Dr. Who, The Great Glass Wonkavator,
and that portal scene from Barbie in the
Nutcracker.
This leads to a pumpkin patch of enormous proportions, where a bunch
of groundskeepers, led by a fleshed-out Jack Skellington named Hay Man (voiced
by Jim Parsons), are dancing to Dangerous
/ Jam. They freak out and flee temporarily upon spotting the kids. They
explain that they’re having fun, when the boss and villainess, Conformity (Lucy
Liu) arrives. She turns one of the groundskeeper into a zombie. Yeah, if you’re
a Michael Jackson fan in any capacity, you can see where this is heading. By
the way, her theme is Dirty Diana.
WHAT!
They follow the music (and Michael Jackson insignia) to a room full of
spiders who entrap them. Victoria challenges the leader to a dance-off, which
leads to their escape, and a battle between Conformity and her Crows and the
spider army.
The two kids eventually get caught by Conformity, and are mistaken as
rebel leaders against her machine. A scientist cat plans on stealing music and
destroying it all forever, until the kids talk some sense into him. He, in
turn, grants them his old musical inventions to battle against her. One more
Michael Jackson pose brings the kids and Icky back to the elevator, where
Bubbles is waiting for them. They return to the foyer, but instead of running
for the hills, they instead decide to battle Conformity in a showdown.
The kids collected musical amulets from their newfound friends, and
they install them into the machine that was meant to destroy music, reverse its
effects, and with Vincent’s mixing, combine the three friends into surprisingly
black Michael Jackson – well, I guess not surprising, since Thriller’s being played here -- who
reverses Conformity’s spell. Conformity returns, however, stronger, and in a
live gargoyle formation. She re-enslaves her zombie subjects, and just as it
seems Michael is captured, he puts a hand on her, and reverses her magic again,
this time turning her into a good girl. They then dance together to Thriller, along with the two kids, and
the unzombified inhabitants. And let me tell you, CGI Michael Jackson does NOT
have nearly as impressive moves as the real McCoy.
Of course, all of this ends up with this being “possibly a dream,”
Michael and the Monkey going to their next mission, Michael Jackson’s face
appearing in the moon and winking at us, and Victoria and Vincent being a
couple and a DJ/Dance duo that everyone (including the dad and the boss) all
enjoy. Don’t ask where Victoria’s parents are, clearly nobody knows!
There is a TON of Michael Jackson-esque music and dancing, which I
found great, because my Daddy made me into a mini-fan myself – and trust me,
he’s a HUGE fan… he bought TWO Thriller vinyl albums because he wore one out.
Now, this special does fall privy, as I said before, to “rude humour” that is
oft found in children’s / family media these days, not to mention that the plot
is semi-pointless and really hastily thrown together, but I still enjoyed it.
It doesn’t top The Great Pumpkin, in
my opinion, but it’s a nice thing for the Michael Jackson geek in me to get a few
bars and dance movements out. Honestly, it reminds me of one of those old PC
games I used to play as a kid, where there’s really no way you could lose, the
characters look a little stiff, but you enjoy it, anyway, in all its
cheesiness.
This was fun to write. I think I’ll try a new series out, actually. I
mentioned The Great Pumpkin, so… how
about the Peanuts holiday specials?
What a way to ring in the New Year! Hoping the best for you in 2018!
Bye!
What’s your favorite Michael Jackson song? Mine would have to be Beat It. Check out why below!
--- Sorry, guys, very serious moment coming up ---
This past Christmas, a friend of mine died and went to be with the Lord. I remember meeting him in theater, as well seeing him in a part of college ministry. He was a good friend, and I'm going to miss him, although I am happy that he's gained eternal life. I'll see you in Heaven, Hunter! ,^_^,
